From Dr. Jane's Notebook

Coming to Grips With Aging

Until recently, I knew very little about Mid-Life Crisis... now it seems like we are old friends! Growing up is a little like riding uphill on a bicycle. It seems like forever until we reach the top; then very soon after, we begin to coast and then life rushes by.

The hallmark of the Mid-Life Crisis is our sudden consideration and evaluation of our lives according to "the Big Picture". It often includes the following ideas:

Preserve the Body. Up until this point, we usually regard our health-conscious habits as "matters of choice". Exercise has been for sport and pleasure. It is only when we come to grips with the reality of cholesterol, family diseases, and strained muscles, that the true meaning of mid-life becomes clear.
Maintain the Mind. Everything we do is effected by how we think. To be successful, we must think success! We must think positively, set goals, and then encourage ourselves. Self-esteem becomes a valuable commodity. If we are unhappy or depressed, we owe it to ourselves to seek professional help.
Strive to increase your Self-Esteem. When we realize the proportion of our time and energy spent on work, it becomes vitally important that our work be satisfying. Mid-life is the time when we assess whether we made the right career decisions, or whether another avenue needs to be explored. It is never too late to improve our work situation.
Relationships give life meaning. We fear loneliness and abandonment. The things that make us happy usually involve others. If your family life is not all that you want it to be, work to make it better. Relationships with others are the fuel for motivation, action and enthusiasm.
To fully appreciate life, we must keep a perspective on death. At a certain point in time, when we realize our mortality, life gains a timeline. We realize that the quality of our lives is directly proportional to our physical and mental health, the quality of our work and the quality of our relationships. Although we always know about death, it remains an impersonal concept until we fully consider it for ourselves.

In Short, my son asked me about the subject of this month's article. I replied, "mid-life crisis", for which he asked a definition. I said, " its a time when you take stock of your life and decide if its the way you want it to be". My daughter simplified it even further... "it's a time when you go nuts!"

Return to Personal Growth

Return to Table of Contents

Last Updated October 24, 1998 by Gary M. Grandon, Ph.D.